My Tasks All Yell at the Same Volume: ADHD and Prioritization (+Action Plan!)
When I was diagnosed with ADHD four years ago, my inability to prioritize was probably my biggest complaint. It was debilitating. At any given moment, my tasks were all floating around in my mind looking equally important. I spent so much energy trying to decide what mattered most. And when I couldn’t see through the noise (always), I’d just pluck something at random.
Should I pick up that toy on the ground? Plan our summer vacation? Do the dishes? Call the insurance company? Find snacks for the class party? Finish writing that song? I think we’re out of napkins…
No differentiation and no internal ranking system. I hear some people’s brains just do this for them! I have no idea what that feels like. It’s confetti over here.
For those of us with ADHD, prioritization can be one of the most frustrating executive functioning challenges. It’s absolutely not about laziness or not caring. (We actually tend to care SO MUCH that it’s infuriating to not be able to succeed.)
ADHD brains just process urgency, importance, and emotional weight differently. Tasks tend to hold the same weight in our minds, which makes it incredibly hard to know what should come first.
It turns out that better systems are what bridge the gap. I don’t think my actual brain function in this area has improved, but over time I have built some better systems to support me so that it is way less of a struggle for me now.
This isn’t a plug for a specific app - any of them can work. What matters is that it’s:
A system your brain understands
Something you don’t hate using
Simple enough that it doesn’t slow you down
You just need a place to capture your tasks and ideas, and a way to categorize them.
There are two main ways to prioritize: by importance and by urgency. I’ll show you two simple frameworks my clients like, but your brain is definitely going to want and need to adapt them. Go with your gut. Think about what already works for you (even a little bit, and even inconsistently) and build from there.
Before we start, I want to acknowledge something: your path might be littered with the remains of planners, journals, calendars, and systems you tried and abandoned. Maybe you felt that familiar burst of New Plan Energy, stuck with it for three days or a week, and then “failed.” Part of this work is going to be self-compassion. Of course this is hard. Your brain is not built for rigid systems. But we can do this.
This time you’re going to make small changes, not overhaul your entire life in one week. And get some support - a friend, therapist, an ADHD group. Doing this alone is harder than it needs to be.
Step 1: Pick a Place
Choose one spot that will serve as the “home” for all tasks, ideas, reminders.
Paper can work (one sheet only), but it’s harder to move things around. Sticky notes can work as a starting point, like one task per note. I personally like a blank spreadsheet or a simple app like Microsoft To Do. Start with whatever is easiest.
Step 2: Brain Dump
Dump every thought and reminder into that one place. All of it. This step alone often brings a huge sense of relief. When your brain trusts that the task has somewhere to live, it doesn’t have to ping you constantly. Slowly, your internal reminder system can rest a bit.
Step 3: Sort into Buckets
Now you’re going to put tasks into categories. Two easy options:
Option A: Today – Tomorrow – This Week – Later
This is pure urgency-based scheduling. You’ll shuffle things around as time passes.
Option B: Today – Essential – Would Be Nice
This one balances urgency and importance.
Put everything in either an Essential or Would Be Nice category.
Then look at your Essentials and pull the 1–3 things that truly must happen immediately into Today.
Tomorrow, pull the next 1-3 over.
As your Essentials shrink, pull some Would Be Nice items into the Today box. Now you’re working ahead of schedule!
Step 4: Set an Alarm
Once everything is in your system, set a daily alarm reminding you to look at it. You don’t have to do anything on the list. Just glance at it. A task list hidden on your phone helps no one. This step is what completes the outsourcing of prioritization to your system.
Step 6: Maintain
I hate that word. But hopefully you’ve found a more sustainable method that’s easy to access and drop ideas into. Having a paper and pencil next to your bed can also help with the stuff you remember only as you’re drifting off to sleep.
Later: What’s Working for Me Now
If things start to feel more settled, you can tweak your setup.The goal is more support, not complexity or being impressive. I struggle with prioritization so much that I pay about 20euro/month for what is basically a virtual scheduling assistant (Motion). It arranges my tasks, tells me what to do today, and auto-reschedules things when I run behind. This might be overkill for some of you. Before that, I used Microsoft To Do. The important thing is that every task gets a date - even an arbitrary one - and ideally a priority label.
Some Favorite Task Managers
My clients have really liked ToDoist, Trello, Notion, Obsidian, To Do, and Motion.
The goal isn’t to build the perfect system. It’s to build the simplest system that works well enough that you don’t have to constantly manage this ADHD symptom. Do it just well enough that you have more energy for the interesting stuff - the things your brain actually loves doing.
Need Some Help?
I work on this stuff with clients all the time - customizing a plan that actually works for them, holding them accountable for maintaining the system and celebrating together when it actually starts to work. Such a relief! If you think you could use some extra support, reach out to me.
